Something Precious
Hashem has a plan for each of us. Often the goodness of that plan is hard to see and His kindness evades our simple view. One woman writes of her trust and faith in all that He does, even through her pain.
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The Truth Is
Fourteen years ago I gave birth to a baby girl. Four hours later she died because of an internal malformation that was undetectable during my pregnancy.
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Songs of Innocence
I have a confession to make: My spiritual mentor is not a rabbi, or a teacher, or a scholar. You might say he is a spiritual guide of a more unconventional sort.
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A Tiny Seed A Precious Flower
Written from the heart trying to understand Hashem's ways, this poem touches the soul.
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Pidyon Haben - Redemption of a First Born Male
G-d originally designated the firstborn as those who would carry out the priestly duty in the Mishkan (Sanctuary). Shortly after receiving the Torah at Mount Sinai, the Jewish people collectively committed idolatry by serving the Golden Calf.
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Who Is Rich?
Can I afford a large family? Should we have a big family and hope for divine assistance to maintain our standard of living?
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Kabbalistic Help for Tantrums
I am having major problems with my two year old. He has huge tantrums and is impossible to control. We are going crazy and don't know what to do. Is there some Kabbalistic formula to get a child to behave?
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Just A Tuna Sandwich
Must one resign themselves to the fact that their life has boiled down to making tuna sandwiches?
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Transforming the Difficult Child
Are you feeling drained from raising a hyperactive child? Recently, I came across a book called Transforming the Difficult Child by Howard Glasser, which offers one of the best drug-free parenting solutions I have ever seen.
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My Favorite Rashi
Living, as he did, in a town with 40 churches and no operating synagogue, I would imagine my stepfather was the only man around with his favorite Rashi.
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Fear of the Darkness
Our five year old is an only child who has been a difficult sleeper since birth and has developed a severe fear of the dark. Every night she wakes up crying, saying she's had a bad dream.
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A Halachic Guide to Pregnancy Loss
The following guide is based on questions that were submitted by women who have experienced the loss of a pregnancy. They relate to taharas hamishpachah, the laws of Shabbos, tumas meis, etc. The answers given by HaRav Kasimov are for general knowledge and should not take the place of asking a she’elah to a Rav, as even a slight detail may change the psak. While this is not a complete guide to the halachas pertaining to pregnancy loss, these are the most frequently asked questions.
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On The Path To Healing
By Divine Providence, the deadline for this article fell on the anniversary of my own miscarriage three years ago. I planned it, wrote and rewrote the article in my head, revising it for months.
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A Mother Without A Child
I had it really easy growing up. I come from a loving family, with wonderful parents and great friends. I graduated with honors, attended an Ivy League university and landed a prestigious job as soon as I finished.
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Are You Mine?
Are You Mine? A Poem on Stillbirth
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The Behaviour Disorder No One Wants to Talk About
This is the fourth in a series of six articles that we hope will be helpful in guiding you, the reader, in your decisions about what might be driving a childs behavior.
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With Woman, With Life
Midwife is a word in old German meaning with woman. Historically, as well as today, it categorizes a specific profession in medicine.
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Hearing Emotions
If I had to condense our overarching goal of preschool into a single sentence it would be to encourage our children to value their thoughts and feelings and to use them to make active choices that will allow them to lead a fulfilling life.
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Priorities
Teaching priorities to our children, learning them for ourselves, can be a challenging task. Torah clearly shows us how to prioritize!
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The Pressure Principle
Does security and comfort bring us success? Does challenge and adversity make us stronger, better than before?
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Sholom's First Haircut
This past Monday, our son Sholom turned three years old and got his very first haircut. Although, our morning routine will be now be one step shorter...
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Dearest Kallah
Mazal Tov! You are about to begin a brand new chapter of your life and I wish you bracha and hatzlacha in every aspect of your journey.
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Eleven Parenting Beliefs to Raise A Healthy Child
No parent is perfect, not I nor you. Your task is to do your best which will include at times mistakes. Sometimes these mistakes are obvious or sometimes you will only become aware of them in hindsight.
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A Trace of Eden
The gift of a mother to her precious child
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Lights at the End of the Tunnel
By the time I reached my early thirties, I felt my biological clock pounding away as I searched for a suitable husband. I was so relieved to get married at the age of 36, and assumed that I would get pregnant almost immediately.
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A Tiny Little Bundle
Each life is a miracle. Sometimes, that miracle is here for just a moment in time. Only Hashem understands why.
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Morning Blessings
I've been noticing recently that my husband is taking a few more minutes to recite Birchas Hashachar (morning blessings). Of course, he has good reason for the extra concentration.
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Special Child
A meeting was held far from earth With the angels and G-d above. They said it is time again for another birth This child will need much love.
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The Gift of Loss: Talking About My Miscarriage
Even though statistics show that many women reading this right now have experienced the loss of a pregnancy, most of these women have not and likely never will publicly address or even mention in private the fact of their miscarriage. Being that this kind of death is a fact of many women's lives, and that silence and shame only exaggerate the pain, I am opening up about my own miscarriage, which occurred a little over two months ago.
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Is It Bad Behavior or Behavior Disorder?
This is the first in a series of six articles that we hope will be helpful in guiding you, the reader, in your decisions about what might be driving a child's behavior.
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Stillbirth: Trying to Understand
When your baby is stillborn, expectations, hopes and dreams are cruelly shattered and lives are changed. Many parents have initial feelings of shock and confusion when told that their baby has died. What happened? Why you?
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Temper, Temper
What do I do when my five-year-old gets angry? He becomes furious and aggressive when he doesnt get what he wants.
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It's A Girl
Why don't we do a "Sholom Nekeiva" (lit. welcome female) upon the birth of a girl, as we do a Sholom Zochor for a baby boy?
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Chaya's Journey
A poem written from the heart upon the loss of a child
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Jewish Population Control
The Torah speaks of the enslavement and bitter bondage of the Israelites in Egypt. In spite of the back-breaking oppression, the hardship and humiliation, the Jewish people would be forged in the fiery furnace of exile.
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Effective Team Parenting
Children always have parents, regardless if the parents are married, separated or divorced. As parents, it is a major responsibility to raise our children to become healthy adults...
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Naming A Child
In general, the giving of a name should be looked upon as a great responsibility that involves serious consideration by the parents. In many places in Kabbalah and Chassidus it is explained...
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A Time to Be Silent
The most important gift we can give our children is self-esteem. Research has shown over and over again that children who have a positive self-image are able to go out and take on the world.
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Breastfeeding and Jewish Law
A general outline of the laws of breastfeeding. A woman should consult her own Rav for any clarifications.
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CEO of the EU (Entire Universe)
Once again, I had the awesome privilege of participating in the birth of a new grandchild. My daughter, who is one of the emissaries of the Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem M. Schneerson, OBM, in Milan, Italy, came to visit us in L.A...
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Resources for Loss Support
We are blessed to have so many systems in place to help others during their time of need. Each organization listed is unique, so read through the descriptions to find the best fit for you. Most of the services offered are free of charge.
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Jewish Perspectives on the Birthing Experience
A labor and delivery nurse concludes her report of a newly-delivered primigravida with the following comments: "I have some real concerns...
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From A Medical Perspective
It was November 2003 when Mara Barths home pregnancy test revealed the happy news: She and her husband, Jeff, were going to have a baby. But just six weeks into her pregnancy, Mara, then 33, began having cramps followed by some light bleeding.
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Advice to an Expectant Mother
So, you're pregnant. Mazel Tov! I'm flattered to be asked and please, feel free to call or write anytime for advice.
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The Spirit's Journey to Motherhood
At my baby shower, my friend Sveta pats my bulging belly: Oh, let me touch the baby, she says wistfully, and maybe I can catch this wonderful virus of pregnancy. After years of infertility and painful, expensive medical procedures, she is still not able to conceive. Diagnosis: unknown.
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Motherhood, A New Philosophy
This article will examine the prevalent issues and controversies and the necessity for a new philosophy on babies, motherhood and life in general.
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Mazel Tov! A Blessing for Mother and Child
During the Yud-Tes Kislev farbrengan of 5747, the Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem M. Schneerson, recalled and discussed an interesting age-old custom which has gone out of style in modern times.
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From Here To Eternity
Its always seemed to me that the discussion of conception and child-bearing is an intensely private one, one to be held primarily between husband and wife.
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Parenting In A Difficult World
Ever since a tragic accident (r"l) in my community, I have become very concerned about my children's safety.
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Teach a Child
Hashem created this world for His children, for you and for me, See the splendor in His creation, from sea to shimmering sea.
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Beautiful, Beautiful Baby Day
April 11, 2006 - two days before Passover. I loaded my grocery cart with Matzoh, wine, grape juice, ground walnuts, romaine lettuce, eggs, Kosher salt - the essentials.
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Flickering Between Two Worlds
My 13 year-old is an excellent student and loves to read but thats all he wants to do! READ! I havent been able to interest him in any sports or activities outside the house.
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Early Miscarriage, A Husbands View
It was during our first year of marriage; my wife was three months pregnant, for the first time. We were staying at my parents for Yom Kippur.
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Her World
My daughter took a paperweight off my husband's desk, It was shaped like a globe, with oceans, countries, and the rest.
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Understanding the Observant Childbirth Experience
Revised from a lecture given to a team of medical care professionals, this article addresses the often misunderstood behavior of observant couples during their hospital stay for birth and recovery.
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Public Displays of Affection?
How will my children understand love if they never see displays of affection between their parents?
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The Marshmallow Mentsch
Part of the make-up of the mentsch is the power of self-discipline. A characteristic of our ideal human being is the ability to make decisions based not only on expected short-term satisfaction but also with a view to the long-term.
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A Message of Blessing for Mother and Child
During the Yud-Tes Kislev farbrengen, 5747, the Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem M. Schneerson, of righteous memory, recalled and discussed an interesting custom that has been forgotten in modern times.
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Raising Eco Conscious Children
Life has so many blessings; what's often missing is our mindfulness, taking pause to recognize and appreciate them.
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The Art of Baby Naming
My wife has entered the seventh month of pregnancy, and we have started discussing names for our baby. She wants something traditional but...
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Not So Great - Expectations
I wind little tendrils of wet, blonde hair around my fingers, making curls as I go. Perfect little circles make a golden halo. Finally, I have created my masterpiece a head full of ringlets.
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Torahs Viewpoint on Pregnancy Loss
Every part of our lives, from the happiest moments to the terribly unfortunate ones, is recognized by the Torah, G-ds life script of infinite wisdom. The Torah prescribes instructions which help guide our attitudes, our responses and our behaviors for all of life.
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A Sacred Career
No glamor, no fame, no set hours or conventional pay! I wouldn't have it any other way!
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My Mikvah Baby
I am a Jew, but I am not religious. I light candles Friday night, but don't keep Shabbat. I don't eat pork, but I mix dairy and meat. I don't know the Hebrew prayers, but I speak to G d.
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Who's The Boss?
When my daughter doesnt get her way, she bothers me until she causes a scene. At home I just send her to her room. But when were out shopping I usually give in to her, just to quiet her down. How can I get her to behave when we go out?
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Focus the Energy
This is the second in a series of six articles that we hope will be helpful in guiding you, the reader, in your decisions about what might be driving a child's behavior.
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Can a Pregnant Woman Enter a Cemetery?
I have been told it is generally not the done thing in the Jewish religion to go to a cemetery when pregnant...
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Do You Wish Mazel Tov?
I just found out that a friend is pregnant. She is quite observant so I want to do the right thing. Is it appropriate to say Mazal Tov to a pregnant woman?
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Mazel Tov! It's A Girl
Baby girls do not have a bris (circumcision) with its accompanying pomp and festivity. Are they less important? Are we less joyous and thrilled over their birth than over the birth of a baby boy? Not at all...
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Taking Charge
The successful education and guidance of children requires an effective strategy. A successful strategy can be broken into three components; goals, motivation, and techniques.
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Wicked Children and Post Modern Parents
One thing I never understood in the Haggadah of Pesach. What's so wise about the Wise Son? He asks his parents, "What are all the laws that our G-d has commanded you?"
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Increasing Work and Family Harmony
When you get married or live in a committed relationship, particularly when you have children, it can be difficult to balance work and home life. Sometimes these legitimate and competing interests can cause conflict. Here are 5 tips that will help you make home and work harmonious and improve all your relationships:
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Can A Soul Be Miscarried
I suffered a miscarriage recently. While I am thankful for the beautiful children I have, I still feel a sense of loss for the child that I will never know. Is there some kabbalistic explanation for why these things happen?
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Raising Children in Harmony
Marriage is for growth. By its very nature your marriage will continuously give you opportunities to develop your character. The more challenging one's marriage, the greater the growth possibilities.
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The Magic Pill for At Risk Behavior
I know how badly parents want to find the pill to cure their teenager's at-risk behavior. In fact, most parents wished there was a magic pill they or their children could take and the problems would somehow go away.
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Ask A Child
As I walk through the hallways of our preschool and peek into the classrooms I am always amazed by the sense of confidence that our children seem to have.
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The Three Dollar Miracle
Story of a childless woman and a miracle, told in her own words
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Birth of A Jewish Child
Many couples have accepted the custom of announcing a pregnancy after the mother enters the fifth month. It does not apply to sharing the news in confidentiality with immediate family.
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A Jewish Education Begins at Birth
Visual images have great impact on man's mind: What one sees can leave lasting impressions for good or bad.[1] Viewing sacred objects or images has positive benefits;[2] pictures of impure animals harm[3] the mind and soul.
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A Souls Safe Landing
Please G-d we are expecting a baby soon. We know that if it is a boy then we can't tell anyone his name until the Bris. But why?
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I Am Just Like You
Married, waiting to conceive...trusting in Hashem...
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Oppositional Defiant Disorder
This is the third in a series of six articles that we hope will be helpful in guiding you, the reader, in your decisions about what might be driving a child's behavior.
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The Boy or the Bottle?
Times are financially stressful. What does that mean to our children? Where should we cut corners? Where should we not cut corners?
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Divine Labor
It is written in Torah about the Hebrew women in Egypt, "For they are like midwives, before the midwife comes to them, they have given birth." (Exodus 1:19)
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Monster Dreams
"Mommy, Mommy!" Sobbing loudly, Naomi ran into my bedroom in the middle of the night, for the fourth time that week. A recurring nightmare kept waking her from her sleep.
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Should We Chop Fingers Off?
We had a baby boy and we are very excited. But we are still undecided about the Bris. I have issues with it. I am aware of the spiritual significance of the circumcision, but I have much more practical concerns.
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The Eternal Covenant
A Bris is a covenant and through the millennia, Jews have kept this mitzvah like no other and have thereby maintained their eternal covenant with G-d. There were times when giving one's son a bris was punishable by death.
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A Jewish Perspective on Miscarriage and Stillbirth
By hashgacha pratis (Divine Providence) the deadline for this article was around the time of the anniversary of my own miscarriage three years ago.
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Bris Milah - Circumcision
A Jew is commanded to circumcise his son on the eighth day after his birth, when his faculty of reason is not yet developed. This aspect signifies that a Jew is bound and committed to G-d at the earliest opportunity, in an absolute and all comprehensive way that transcends his reason and perception.
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On the Eighth Day
I rush to the hospital to see both mother and newborn baby. To be perfectly honest, I focus much attention on The Baby once I have checked that the new mother is doing well feeling the way a brand new mother usually feels.
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I am Pregnant and Feel I Can Not Handle a Baby Now
Overwhelmed by an unexpected pregnancy? Open up to the possibilities.
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The View From My Child's Window
As parents we know more than our children. We are older and wiser. We have more experience and this experience often makes us more practical, smarter in the ways of the world.
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Shir Hamalos
As expectant women approach their due dates a variety of emotions tend to surface. Some women are filled with excitement, anxiously anticipating the day that they will meet their baby face to face.
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Happy Birthday!
We are a holy nation of holy people. With every breath we take and every action we do, we can express our spiritual greatness. Birth, especially, is a very elevating experience, and is, in many ways, a lot like Pesach (Passover).
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Surviving Emotionally
Now that you have experienced a pregnancy loss, you are probably feeling more sadness then you ever thought possible. The emotional impact often takes longer to heal than the physical impact. Allowing yourself to grieve the loss can help you come to accept it over time.
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Zeese Neshamale
A special neshama, here for just a moment in time, fulfills its purpose in a way we cannot understand
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Let Kids Be Kids
How to teach today's precocious kids values...How to prepare them for the adult world without treating them as adults...How to command respect while respecting them as well...
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