Something Precious
I have this lump that doesn't want to go away. The people around me wish I'd swallow it but that isn't doable, though i wish i could, then it would remain with me.
Life is precious. Too precious to be taken for granted.
Some of us are perhaps more aware of that than others.
The arrival of new life is celebrated.
When the arrival is fresh, and still remains practically hidden, the celebration is a quiet one.
As its arrival in our world becomes more practically defined and imminent, the celebration and gladness step up a notch.
And when that new life emerges for all to see, the joy is celebrated with fanfare.
Same with life that leaves this world.
A life that was lived to its fullest and appreciated, is mourned when it leaves. Those around grieve and are given time to absorb their loss.
A life that was lived but only for a short time, is missed when gone. Those who haven't had a chance to get to know it, can easier forget.
A life that was never known, never heard, and parted almost without chance to be celebrated seems to have no chance to be missed.
Oh, but it is missed.
By those who celebrated its arrival.
By those who cherish the very essence of life.
By those who anticipated this new life for an eternity of time.
By those who breathed their every breath for too short a time sharing it with that life.
By those who yearned to share a lifetime with this new life.
By those who loved its very being.
By those who carried it.
By me.
Don't tell me not to miss it.
Don't tell me it never lived.
Don't tell me to move on.
That hurts me.
It denies the existence of the life i carried.
Of the life i yearned for.
Of the life i loved.
I can accept my loss as it is Hashem who gives and takes.
I can accept my loss as it is Hashem who knows what's best.
I can accept my loss as it is Hashem who decides how and when.
But you, can you accept my loss?
Can you accept that Hashem gave and took?
Can you accept that Hashem knows what is best?
Hashem decided when to give but then He took it back?
Acknowledge my loss, help me accept it.
Acknowledge my loss, that will help me absorb it.
Acknowledge my loss, for that's what it is.
A loss of something precious.
An unknown but bright future.
Ultimately it's the loss of life giving way for something greater than life.
Hashem's master plan.
I stand humbled.
And thank you for allowing me to accept His plan with love.